Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Blockages in my heart

I hope your pulse didn't quicken when you saw that headline. I am not referring to my physical, made of tissue, four chambered heart. I am talking about my real heart, my spiritual heart. So many times we say that we just have a lot of stuff on our mind, but I don' t feel that sentiment is true enough for me. Not right now anyways. I feel like I have some stuff that is blocking up my heart right now. Stuff that makes me want to cry, laugh, sing and be quiet. So, bear with me as I bare my soul a little bit.

Jesus is so...whew. It is hard to put into words all that I am feeling about Him right now. My relationship with Him has been so rich and sweet lately. For the past several mornings I have felt as though I could hear His voice beckoning to me to wake from my sleep. He calls me to His Word, He speaks truth to my heart and challenges, convicts and blesses me with it. We have spent some really beautiful times together on some really long walks during the past few weeks. I am not trying to be super spiritual or mystical with what I am about to say, but it has felt as though He has literally been walking right beside me. He speaks about what He is doing in my life right now and what He has planned for me in the future. I am overwhelmed at His love for me. He is so patient with me, so tender, so gracious. As I head back into the house after about an hour it is as if He gives me a big hug and says, "I can't wait for tomorrow." Jesus is my best friend. I can truly say that.

The world has been heavy on my heart recently. Some really good friends of mine have just returned from a mission trip to Romania where they loved on some orphan children with the love of Jesus. I have been with many of them on that same trip, or should I say on a trip like that (since every trip is unique and special). I know that it is such a blessing to be with those kids. I miss their smiles and their laughter. I miss watching their eyes as they listen to how much God loves them. I am leaving for Asia in less than 2 weeks. My team, which there are only 6 of us I think, will be teaching house church and factory church leaders for multiple hours a day. Teaching them what? The good and glorious truth of God's Word. We will be covering topics like the family, the Gospel, singleness, persecution and the New Testament. I am beyond words when I think about the incredible privilege and honor that is mine in this endeavor. Please, pray for us. Pray that we will be empty of ourselves and that we will walk full of the Holy Spirit. It is just such an awesome reality to be apart of what the Lord is doing all over the world. I am looking forward to being out of my comfort zone and smack dab in the middle of such an important work that the Lord is doing.

In the Gospel of John, in chapters 14-16, Jesus says something pretty incredible. He says that if we ask Him, God, for anything, He will give it to us. Now, I know that this is not referring to a spiritual blank check and that whatever we ask must be complicit with His will. I know that, but don't miss what Jesus is saying. He says that if we ask for anything, and that thing being pleasing to the Father, He will give it to us. I am not espousing "name it and claim it" theology, but I do believe that this truth should change our prayer life. I'll tell you one area that this has really impacted my praying and that is in my ministry. Youth ministry. I am praying, asking the Lord that He would give us Brighton High School. I am praying, asking that He would use students from my ministry to greatly impact that school for His glory. What all does that mean? Well, I will write more about that later and I am going to be preaching on it very soon. I just want to see the Lord display His power and might in our local context and I want Him to use our students to do it. I know that is a bold, big request, but I am talking to Jesus and I know that He can handle it.

Well, those are just a few of things that have been lodged in my heart as of late. I know that all of this seems random, but it's my blog, so deal with it. :)

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